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These are so funny!!!

who's talking here?

Vanessa 1
Carel 2
Paige 1
Ligia 1
Eryn 1
Vanessa. C 1

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Carel --- 8 years ago -

Why's of Men 1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX? (because they are plugged into a genius) 2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX? (they don't have enough time 3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG? (they don't stop to ask directions) 4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS? (because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock) (You're laughing, aren't you?!?!) 5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS? (so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties) 6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN? (you need a rough draft before you make a final copy) 7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN? (don't know.....it never happened) And the personal favorite: 8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH? (because a vibrator can't mow the lawn) Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face and laughter in your heart...Then you are just an old sour fart! One for the ladies One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?' He yelled back, ' University of Oklahoma .' And they say blondes are dumb... --------------------------------------- A couple is lying in bed. The man says, 'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.' The woman replies, 'I'll miss you...' --------------------------------------- 'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?' 'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied. --------------------------------------- Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man? A: A rumor --------------------------------------- Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN --------------------------------------- Q: Why do little boys whine? A: They are practicing to be men. --------------------------------------- Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough. ---------------------------------------How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual.  

Vanessa --- 8 years ago -

so cute Love it!!!! 

Eryn --- 8 years ago -

Verrrrry Funny =) 

Ligia --- 8 years ago -

Haha, I like the "rumor". 

Vanessa. C --- 8 years ago -

Love it, this was very funny 

Carel --- 8 years ago -

Bobbitt Family Update In a recent news broadcast, it was announced that Lorena Bobbitt's sister Louella, was arrested for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago. Sources reveal the sister was not as accurate as Lorena. She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper thigh, causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to be in serious, but stable condition, and Louella has been charged with**.... A Misdewiener! 

Paige --- 8 years ago -

the bobbitt was my favorite!!! 

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